When you are Hawaiian-Chinese like me, you are very sensitive to the unseen in the environment. I was raised with stories of night marchers, mo'o, evil spirits waiting to get your fingernail clippings or hanging out with your laundry left on the clothesline after sunset. Perhaps the awareness is simply an understanding that there are forces in our lives that go beyond the concrete and tangible. This is healthy respect engendered to promote proper behavior and consideration.
But some things are just too weird. There are collections of occurrences that warn us that we are going down the wrong path. For example, after I finished my doctoral studies, I wanted to apply for a post-doctoral award so I spent a lot of time distilling my dissertation to meet the requirements of the award. When I checked my writeup, pieces were mysteriously missing and appeared in strange sequence. So I redid my writeup only to find out that the download was again all kapakahi (mixed up). I took my disc to the computing center to see if they could clean it up. They tried to do their best but suggested that I retype my writeup just in case. This is like the fifth or sixth time I am redoing this darn paper. I am no quitter and wanted to see the project through. The last straw occurred as the deadline neared. The neon sign of destiny had been turned on. One night, I was working late in the University of Southern Mississippi's library when a sudden thunder storm struck. Lightning hit the library, and the electricity was knocked out. We sat in the darkness for a few seconds. Everybody's computer came back on except for mine!! Whatever I had typed was lost. When I went to see the librarian the next day, she said that all the computers were operative except for the one I was working on. It was inoperative.
That was the last straw. In frustration, I went to my major professor for my dissertation committee and explained the string of events and told him that I was withdrawing because the lightning strike was a sign that I was barking up the wrong tree. Dr. Hamilton Williams was the best professor anyone could ask for and he agreed that perhaps I should not pursue it. He wished me well and told me that he would see me at the commencement exercise. Then he said that it would be his last commencement. I made light of his comments and reminded him about how he was so loved by his students and everyone was jockeying to see if he would serve on their committee.
Graduation came, with the post-doctoral award forgotten, we shared orchid leis with our friends. That was the last time I saw Dr. Hamilton who suddenly passed away a few weeks after graduation. Were the weird string of events a harbinger of things to come? Was the computer trying to tell me something? I don't know but am certain that our energies have a direct relationship to how well or how poorly technological hardware operations. There are signs in our lives. We need to be open to them to understand the path we should be taking. Don't let the neon sign of destiny flash...it might be too late for corrective action.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Even Old Farts Can Have Hot Adventures
Now that we are in our 60s, we are settling into a quiet country life filled with routines, simple pleasures, and a lot less rushing around. We have our evenings categorized by what TV shows we will watch.
Everything changed when we went to Honolulu last weekend. Right off the plane, we went to a fab clearance sale of Reyn Spooner clothing. There were thousands of shirts for sale running from $15, $25, and $40. Bargain-mania. After seeing so many shirts, had to start getting sassy and became more choosy about what we would buy. Christmas shopping is done...at least for the kanes in our family.
We had several eating adventures in mind. First was to go to Mr. Mandoo on Pi'ikoi Street for their spicy mandoo which are like manapua which got lost in Korea. Spicy pockets of yummy washed down with iced coffee.
Second on our list was our favorite Korean restaurant. While we had diligently researched the best Korean restaurants, we ended walking to a restaurant right near to the Ala Moana Hotel. The restaurant is right next to the strip joint, Femme Nu Club. I don't know who was more embarrassed...me or the young men waiting to get into the strip joint. Beyond this though, we know it is a good restaurant because we were the only Haole - Kanaka couple in the whole joint. Most of the customers were Honolulu Koreans. We had 12 kinds of side dishes, chupchae, pulkogi, fried mandoo (the authentic kind), and korean style miso soup. We nibbled until our pikos were turned inside out. Waddling back to the hotel helped to settle the food in our opus. Luckily we both enjoyed the food because the cloud of garlic settled in our hotel room.
In our research, we found a restaurant called The Counter in Kahala Mall. A customer can build his/her own burger starting with 1/3 pound patties. (There were bigger burgers available.) One could choose a beef, turkey, pork, or grilled chicken protein choice with 4 kinds of toppings, cheese of various types, sauce, and choice of bun. Don't choose a bun...the burger came and it was a tower of food. I had a 1/3 pound beef burger with mixed greens, grilled onions, tomato, mushrooms, with garlic aioli on a whole wheat bun. Could not wrap my mouth around the burger. Had to break it up into bite-able increments. Choose a burger in a bowl. Don't waste your opu space on bread. They also had sweet potato fries, french fries, and onion rings. The restaurant was packed with people. Considering the lines that kept queueing outside the restaurant, the service was pretty fast.
Of course, we had to go to Shirokiya for their breads and Hokkaido specialty foods, the Cookie Corner, Aloha Salads for mixed salads of all kids. The most amazing thing is that when we got home, I lost 3 pounds. Now how did that happen? Perhaps I lost weight spending far too much money on Christmas gifts, shoes, and jewelry. Ahh me...at least it was a change of pace from our quiet pastoral life. Even old farts can have a hot adventure...of course it may be a lukewarm adventure by comparison to other folks. But it was good enough for us!!
Everything changed when we went to Honolulu last weekend. Right off the plane, we went to a fab clearance sale of Reyn Spooner clothing. There were thousands of shirts for sale running from $15, $25, and $40. Bargain-mania. After seeing so many shirts, had to start getting sassy and became more choosy about what we would buy. Christmas shopping is done...at least for the kanes in our family.
We had several eating adventures in mind. First was to go to Mr. Mandoo on Pi'ikoi Street for their spicy mandoo which are like manapua which got lost in Korea. Spicy pockets of yummy washed down with iced coffee.
Second on our list was our favorite Korean restaurant. While we had diligently researched the best Korean restaurants, we ended walking to a restaurant right near to the Ala Moana Hotel. The restaurant is right next to the strip joint, Femme Nu Club. I don't know who was more embarrassed...me or the young men waiting to get into the strip joint. Beyond this though, we know it is a good restaurant because we were the only Haole - Kanaka couple in the whole joint. Most of the customers were Honolulu Koreans. We had 12 kinds of side dishes, chupchae, pulkogi, fried mandoo (the authentic kind), and korean style miso soup. We nibbled until our pikos were turned inside out. Waddling back to the hotel helped to settle the food in our opus. Luckily we both enjoyed the food because the cloud of garlic settled in our hotel room.
In our research, we found a restaurant called The Counter in Kahala Mall. A customer can build his/her own burger starting with 1/3 pound patties. (There were bigger burgers available.) One could choose a beef, turkey, pork, or grilled chicken protein choice with 4 kinds of toppings, cheese of various types, sauce, and choice of bun. Don't choose a bun...the burger came and it was a tower of food. I had a 1/3 pound beef burger with mixed greens, grilled onions, tomato, mushrooms, with garlic aioli on a whole wheat bun. Could not wrap my mouth around the burger. Had to break it up into bite-able increments. Choose a burger in a bowl. Don't waste your opu space on bread. They also had sweet potato fries, french fries, and onion rings. The restaurant was packed with people. Considering the lines that kept queueing outside the restaurant, the service was pretty fast.
Of course, we had to go to Shirokiya for their breads and Hokkaido specialty foods, the Cookie Corner, Aloha Salads for mixed salads of all kids. The most amazing thing is that when we got home, I lost 3 pounds. Now how did that happen? Perhaps I lost weight spending far too much money on Christmas gifts, shoes, and jewelry. Ahh me...at least it was a change of pace from our quiet pastoral life. Even old farts can have a hot adventure...of course it may be a lukewarm adventure by comparison to other folks. But it was good enough for us!!
Friday, July 24, 2009
It's a Number Game
It's funny how we get attached to or repulsed by certain numbers. For example, if you go out on a date, it's not cool to go as a threesome as one person ends up having to hold "chochin" the proverbial third wheel lantern.
In Japan, people don't like the number four (shi) as the character is part of the phrase "shinuru" which means to die so to live on the fourth floor or in apartment four does not bode good fortune. Just as we skip the 13th floor, they do the same for the 4th floor.
In America, people don't like the number 13 as it is the number of misfortune. Examine the level of tension when Friday, the 13th rolls around and it has nothing to do with the movie of the same name. People just get freaked by it and it seems as though the anxiety attracts negative energy.
The Chinese like the number 8 "fat" which means good luck. Our favorite restaurant in Hilo, the Sky Garden Restaurant, does not have their name in the phone book. But now we can remember the phone number which is filled with fat 8s...935-8888!
When we moved from Oahu to the wild rainforest of Volcano, everything was put right when our box number was the same number as my favorite sister's house number in Hawaii Kai. Coincidence? Perhaps but the move has been a good one since 1981 and we have kept the same box number.
Of course, we always think that we are getting a bargain when we need to pay only $29.99 for a product instead of the devilish higher price which is only a penny more. Have you stood in the aisle in a supermarket trying to figure out the real price per unit for an item? Which one is really cheaper per unit? This is where math skills are really important. From the newspaper, we read about how manufacturers are leading us astray with 20% more per package, cases of beer with only 20 containers. Numbers, numbers, numbers! Things are achanging but are we smart enough to figure it out?
In Japan, people don't like the number four (shi) as the character is part of the phrase "shinuru" which means to die so to live on the fourth floor or in apartment four does not bode good fortune. Just as we skip the 13th floor, they do the same for the 4th floor.
In America, people don't like the number 13 as it is the number of misfortune. Examine the level of tension when Friday, the 13th rolls around and it has nothing to do with the movie of the same name. People just get freaked by it and it seems as though the anxiety attracts negative energy.
The Chinese like the number 8 "fat" which means good luck. Our favorite restaurant in Hilo, the Sky Garden Restaurant, does not have their name in the phone book. But now we can remember the phone number which is filled with fat 8s...935-8888!
When we moved from Oahu to the wild rainforest of Volcano, everything was put right when our box number was the same number as my favorite sister's house number in Hawaii Kai. Coincidence? Perhaps but the move has been a good one since 1981 and we have kept the same box number.
Of course, we always think that we are getting a bargain when we need to pay only $29.99 for a product instead of the devilish higher price which is only a penny more. Have you stood in the aisle in a supermarket trying to figure out the real price per unit for an item? Which one is really cheaper per unit? This is where math skills are really important. From the newspaper, we read about how manufacturers are leading us astray with 20% more per package, cases of beer with only 20 containers. Numbers, numbers, numbers! Things are achanging but are we smart enough to figure it out?
Monday, July 20, 2009
Love of Food, Food of Love
Life is unfair! Why is eating so pleasurable and satisfying? Why is losing weight so torturous, lonely, and depressing? It is easy to intake calories with sweet or savory tidbits. It is difficult to ignore commercials displaying pictures of pizzas, fried chicken, and burgers dripping with fat when trying not to eat. It is so unfair.
In Hawaii, food is often the expression of love. A mother cooking for her family enjoys watching her kids eat with gusto as they laugh, talk, tease each other around the dining room table. Food is the expression of her love. It doesn't matter if it took a couple of hours to prepare the food that might be demolished in 40 minutes. It is the social interaction that is part of the eating of the food.
In celebrating my 60th birthday, I asked my kids if they would help me to put on a party to gather friends and family. They agreed so we proceeded. Our park reservation form listed about 40 people attending. Our RSVP list had about a hundred people. Over 100 people showed up and that does not include the 20 or so people who said they were coming and didn't show up. Needless to say, we had a packed house. We did all the food ourselves. Grilled steaks with garlic and lemon, pineapple teriyaki chicken, bean penne casserole for the vegetarians, bean salads, deviled egg salad, sweet potato salad, smoked octopus, rice. Our appetizers included a kimchee medley - tofu, cabbage, seaweed, and cucumber kim chee plates, seared blackened fish, ono cerviche, warabi salad, guacamole and chips. My kids worked hard to grill the steaks. People we hadn't seen in years came and talked to new friends. A loner came and found friendly smiles and listening ears for the evening. We ended the meal with cake, a homemade carrot cake, and platters of gourmet cookies. Wow. Love was flowing. From the hands that made the food, the people who brought the food, the people who ate the food with great appreciation...
For all the enjoyment, we pay the price of having to lose the weight for the eating of the poi. But life is short. Enjoy, enjoy.
In Hawaii, food is often the expression of love. A mother cooking for her family enjoys watching her kids eat with gusto as they laugh, talk, tease each other around the dining room table. Food is the expression of her love. It doesn't matter if it took a couple of hours to prepare the food that might be demolished in 40 minutes. It is the social interaction that is part of the eating of the food.
In celebrating my 60th birthday, I asked my kids if they would help me to put on a party to gather friends and family. They agreed so we proceeded. Our park reservation form listed about 40 people attending. Our RSVP list had about a hundred people. Over 100 people showed up and that does not include the 20 or so people who said they were coming and didn't show up. Needless to say, we had a packed house. We did all the food ourselves. Grilled steaks with garlic and lemon, pineapple teriyaki chicken, bean penne casserole for the vegetarians, bean salads, deviled egg salad, sweet potato salad, smoked octopus, rice. Our appetizers included a kimchee medley - tofu, cabbage, seaweed, and cucumber kim chee plates, seared blackened fish, ono cerviche, warabi salad, guacamole and chips. My kids worked hard to grill the steaks. People we hadn't seen in years came and talked to new friends. A loner came and found friendly smiles and listening ears for the evening. We ended the meal with cake, a homemade carrot cake, and platters of gourmet cookies. Wow. Love was flowing. From the hands that made the food, the people who brought the food, the people who ate the food with great appreciation...
For all the enjoyment, we pay the price of having to lose the weight for the eating of the poi. But life is short. Enjoy, enjoy.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Tribulation and Triumph
Murder in our community, a most heinous event. It rocks us to our very souls. When we know the people affected by the murder, we take it personally. Perhaps we did not really know the victim but we know her mother, her grandfather, her aunt, her cousin, and we really feel for them. The loss, the tragedy, the waste of it all, the devastation, the violation. We cry tears that sneak down our cheeks and we try not to sob or sniff loudly and have others spy on our show of sorrow.
Yet in the wake of the murder...the death, the mother smiles and thanks the people who have come to the funeral. Heartfelt embraces, tears, whispered words of love and encouragement. In the midst of such a loss, love emerges from the ashes of devastation and fills us with hope that there is indeed a God.
In the Hawaiian tradition, we eat together after the funeral. Cooking, eating, and talking are all forms of love. We sit together and talk, perhaps of other things, and yet, we secretly stash the thought that as soon as we leave the funeral, we will go home and tell our kids, our loved ones, "I love you." Sometimes if we are lucky, someone starts strumming on the ukulele, is joined by someone on the guitar and the music washes away our tears. As the sweet music echoes, someone's aunty stands up to do an impromptu hula. All acts of love in the stream of things. Ending off the event by having dessert washes away the bitterness with dark chocolate and luscious cherries, flavor-packed carrot cake topped off with cream cheese frosting, butter mochi - chewy and creamy.
Going to a Chinese funeral is an adventure. With the Buddhist priests' cymbals and bells clanging, the monotone chanting, the clouds of incense smoke are new experiences for the country jacks from Lahaina. We go outside to burn fake money, paper clothing, a paper car, a paper boat, all things needed by the deceased in the underworld. Chinese like to be prepared. After the funeral, we eat dim sum, luscious pockets of pork, shrimp, and crab with hot mustard sauce, and fragrant hot tea. We eat coconut candy before we leave, the sweetness to combat sorrow.
No matter what culture, a funeral brings together loved ones...ancient animosities are put aside, past injustices are forgotten, we focus on the beautiful memories, and live in the present. In the midst of sorrow and tribulation, love is showered down upon us, washing away the tears, and filling us with gratitude and hope for the future.
Yet in the wake of the murder...the death, the mother smiles and thanks the people who have come to the funeral. Heartfelt embraces, tears, whispered words of love and encouragement. In the midst of such a loss, love emerges from the ashes of devastation and fills us with hope that there is indeed a God.
In the Hawaiian tradition, we eat together after the funeral. Cooking, eating, and talking are all forms of love. We sit together and talk, perhaps of other things, and yet, we secretly stash the thought that as soon as we leave the funeral, we will go home and tell our kids, our loved ones, "I love you." Sometimes if we are lucky, someone starts strumming on the ukulele, is joined by someone on the guitar and the music washes away our tears. As the sweet music echoes, someone's aunty stands up to do an impromptu hula. All acts of love in the stream of things. Ending off the event by having dessert washes away the bitterness with dark chocolate and luscious cherries, flavor-packed carrot cake topped off with cream cheese frosting, butter mochi - chewy and creamy.
Going to a Chinese funeral is an adventure. With the Buddhist priests' cymbals and bells clanging, the monotone chanting, the clouds of incense smoke are new experiences for the country jacks from Lahaina. We go outside to burn fake money, paper clothing, a paper car, a paper boat, all things needed by the deceased in the underworld. Chinese like to be prepared. After the funeral, we eat dim sum, luscious pockets of pork, shrimp, and crab with hot mustard sauce, and fragrant hot tea. We eat coconut candy before we leave, the sweetness to combat sorrow.
No matter what culture, a funeral brings together loved ones...ancient animosities are put aside, past injustices are forgotten, we focus on the beautiful memories, and live in the present. In the midst of sorrow and tribulation, love is showered down upon us, washing away the tears, and filling us with gratitude and hope for the future.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
The Mysterious Refrigerator Raider
Have you ever been plagued by a mysterious raider who steals delectable tidbits from your refrigerator during the dead of night? Remember the piece of chocolate dobash cake that you preciously wrapped and lovingly brought home to eat later after the party? You get your glass of ice cold milk ready and can just about taste the dark chocolate frosting being swirled around your mouth with the creamy swallow of milk. You step to the refrigerator door and yank it open. Where is the cake? You slam things around, looking behind bottles of who knows what, and plastic containers of dessicated treasures from weeks ago....
No cake! Perhaps you made a mistake! Another round of slamming things around here and there. Still no cake!! Disappointment, devastation, depression.
The question is: Who ate my cake?
You stare down all the members of your family. Your husband...he wouldn't dare! Your daughter...nah...she's on a diet! Your son...he hasn't come home from soccer practice, there is too much food still left in the refrigerator. Your baby...no, you hid it out of sight.
Hmmmm...the question remains, Who ate my cake?
Friend...accept the fact that there is a mysterious refrigerator raider in the neighborhood who reads our minds and selects the choicest tidbits to steal away in the dead of night.
This afternoon, we are going to dinner to my daughter's house. I had made a salad with corn, beans, sweet peppers, and feta cheese for a picnic yesterday and I made a separate container for our home for Sunday. I promised my daughter we would bring the corn salad. I checked my refrigerator and could not find the salad. I slammed things around. Still no salad.
"Eh Don, did you see the container of corn salad?" I shouted as my husband was going out the door.
"Oh...I ate it," he said matter of factly as if I should have known this fact.
"Did you eat the whole container of salad?" I asked incredulously figuring out that this was about three or four cups of salad in the container.
" Yeah...there wasn't much in the container...I thought it was a leftover," he replied, cocking his head like an inquisitive dog wondering why there was an edge of anger in my voice.
Now I knew who are the corn salad. I will have to scrounge around my cupboard and come up with another salad for Cathy's Sunday Night dinner.
But I still want to know who ate my cake!!
No cake! Perhaps you made a mistake! Another round of slamming things around here and there. Still no cake!! Disappointment, devastation, depression.
The question is: Who ate my cake?
You stare down all the members of your family. Your husband...he wouldn't dare! Your daughter...nah...she's on a diet! Your son...he hasn't come home from soccer practice, there is too much food still left in the refrigerator. Your baby...no, you hid it out of sight.
Hmmmm...the question remains, Who ate my cake?
Friend...accept the fact that there is a mysterious refrigerator raider in the neighborhood who reads our minds and selects the choicest tidbits to steal away in the dead of night.
This afternoon, we are going to dinner to my daughter's house. I had made a salad with corn, beans, sweet peppers, and feta cheese for a picnic yesterday and I made a separate container for our home for Sunday. I promised my daughter we would bring the corn salad. I checked my refrigerator and could not find the salad. I slammed things around. Still no salad.
"Eh Don, did you see the container of corn salad?" I shouted as my husband was going out the door.
"Oh...I ate it," he said matter of factly as if I should have known this fact.
"Did you eat the whole container of salad?" I asked incredulously figuring out that this was about three or four cups of salad in the container.
" Yeah...there wasn't much in the container...I thought it was a leftover," he replied, cocking his head like an inquisitive dog wondering why there was an edge of anger in my voice.
Now I knew who are the corn salad. I will have to scrounge around my cupboard and come up with another salad for Cathy's Sunday Night dinner.
But I still want to know who ate my cake!!
Friday, July 10, 2009
E Mililani Kakou
Did I tell you that I am conducting guerilla warfare against negativity? We are inundated by gloom and doom in the newspaper, on TV...the economy, lack of money and jobs, crime, drugs, people being nasty to each other. How can we even be hopeful when we are being crushed under negative, hope robbing information.
Therefore my campaign for positivity started with a public declaration. Now what I am doing is giving people I know a bumper sticker that says, "E mililani kakou....Let's all give thanks." I have a little saying posted near my desk that reminds me that "All sorrow disappears in the awareness of your blessings." For that, how can we not give thanks. From my office window, I can see the green pasture, the horses that come to graze, the leaves from the tall eucalyptus trees flitting down to earth like single winged butterflies, the gentle rains.
I am going to see how many people put the bumper sticker on their cars. I am going to see how many people take on the phrase or comment on it. "E mililani kakou" I am going to see how many people will join in by publicly declaring to battle negativity by the campaign to spread the attitude of gratitude. We cannot wait for others to begin change. Change begins with us. This very minute!!
Therefore my campaign for positivity started with a public declaration. Now what I am doing is giving people I know a bumper sticker that says, "E mililani kakou....Let's all give thanks." I have a little saying posted near my desk that reminds me that "All sorrow disappears in the awareness of your blessings." For that, how can we not give thanks. From my office window, I can see the green pasture, the horses that come to graze, the leaves from the tall eucalyptus trees flitting down to earth like single winged butterflies, the gentle rains.
I am going to see how many people put the bumper sticker on their cars. I am going to see how many people take on the phrase or comment on it. "E mililani kakou" I am going to see how many people will join in by publicly declaring to battle negativity by the campaign to spread the attitude of gratitude. We cannot wait for others to begin change. Change begins with us. This very minute!!
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