Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Bad is Good

When I first found out I was pregnant,
My world crashed down around me.
Tearfully I broke the news to my mom
I expected mad eyes, loud yelling
But no, there was only a deep sigh
"So what you going to do now?"
I would have felt better if she
Sent a couple good cracks my way
But no, there was only a deep sigh.

When I found out my husband was fooling around,
My world crashed down around me again.
A bottomless fountain of tears flowed
Till my eyes replenished the Pacific.
I was the screaming banshee with mad eyes and loud yelling
But what good would it do? The ties were broken.
"So what am I going to do now?"
Christmas decorations and carols did not cheer
I put his clothes in garbage bags on our stoop
But what good would it do? The ties were broken.

We escaped the daily stress of living
Sold our car and went to Japan
My daughter was now seven, with long hair
Plunked into a school of foreign speakers
All with short haircuts
I thought I left my troubles but they followed me
To the Land of the Setting Sun
Ex-husband sends my daughter his wedding pictures for Christmas
Our little evergreen tree in a vase with paper cranes
Made it a very dismal Christmas for us.
But new landscape, new language, and new adventures,
What could I do but survive
We did our best to enjoy the land of our forefathers
Families on both sides of the Pacific helped.
But what could I do but survive.

Bad is good
Medicine to build strong minds and bodies.
I have an independent daughter thriving who
Does not blame her parents too much for their stupidities.
I have a good husband now who loves me more than I am worth
We have built a family with kids who love each other.
I have learned about sacrifice and family ties
Bad is good, given time.

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